Thursday 29 March 2012

TRUE CONFESSIONS......... ( By Anonymous )

Sometime ago I did a rather terrible thing. Perhaps I was beguiled by misplaced loyalties and wrong motives. On reflection I should have succumbed to the requirements of collective responsibility. Only I didn't. For my sins I tried to protect a sinner from being sinned against. As so often happens I was faced with a difficult and awkward decision. Regretfully, I found myself in a no-win situation , where a conflict of loyalties left me with the terrible dilemma of Hobson's choice.

Time and time again I have wrestled with my conscience about whether or not I took the wrong option. I can't help but feel that my judgement call  was wrong ,  and that I should have followed the lead and wisdom of others. Copping out might well have been the best option ,  providing me with the ultimate escape clause ,where no courage or soul searching is needed . Lengthy dialogues with former colleagues have since followed , but they seem to prove how subsequent communications can so easily descend into bitter, acrimonious, mud slinging rows.

Each day I am made to regret the day I opted for the role of  a dissenter and outspoken critic , choosing to condemn those I should have supported. Secretly I wish I could turn back the clock. Egg on my face is not something I ever intended or wanted. Too many people who once respected me now don't. After what I've been through I've really had enough. Situations like this one inevitably develop into nasty affairs ,  which get completely out of control. An awful reality has hit me that I could be the person responsible for the nightmare scenario that exists today. The looming prospect of an expensive court case where there are no winners unnerves me immensely. Reversing the process is not a possibility,  but I would my sell soul this very minute if it meant I could stop both sides taking their dispute any further. As I don't believe in God ( or the Devil ) praying to God also seems like a pointless exercise .

Perhaps one day I'll learn never to take sides, or challenge the belief that might is right.   

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