Saturday 7 December 2013

THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY REVISITED......

  • Pack : the prevalent mentality of those hell bent on taking control of bridge club affairs
  • Deck : the usual place an opponent gets laid on ,  after a table tiff turns nasty
  • Eavesdropping : a widespread activity carried out by those determined to gain an unfair advantage , by secretly tuning in to overhear the catalogue of mistakes owned up to by others on nearby or adjoining tables 
  • Prune : a highly descriptive term used to describe a wizened old player with a brain of a similar size 
  • Bridge convention : devised by players in the hope that their names will live on long after they have departed  
  • Friendliness : a concept or character trait alien to players sitting around a bridge table
  • Committee : a body of elected individuals charged with high duties and misdemeanours
  • Rumour : the perfect device so often employed with a high degree of success by unscrupulous club members ,  who wish to assassinate the good character of another 
  • Bridge bore : an extremely annoying and irritating person , who never stops talking to those who never stop wishing that he would drop dead 
  • Holding court : the popular pastime of a bridge bore 
  • Insult : a derogatory remark next up in degree of enormity to a unwelcome snub or slight
  • Discrimination : what takes place inside a bridge club when the particulars noted in one member are declared more objectionable than the same particulars observed in another

No comments: