Article by Dr. Sigmund T. Schukelgruber )
Let's get real here........until you entered the world of bridge never in a month of Sundays did you expect to see......
- big strapping men being reduced to tears
- well educated people thinking like dorks
- so much unabated back-stabbing
- post-match discussions becoming re-enactments of " The Spanish Inquisition "
- so many experts all sitting under the same roof
- people having been voted onto committees by popular approval becoming immediately unpopular
- grown men behaving like children
- vast fortunes being spent solely to achieve ranking promotions that mean diddly squat
- players away from the tables spending endless hours on the net reading bridge blogs
- such blatant examples of favouritism, prejudice and bias
- peoples' lives being taken over by nothing more than just a game
- people with such great minds becoming so petty-minded
- good honest folk resorting to cheating
- players being in complete self-denial that their hopeless scores are directly linked to their gross inabilities
- a simple overtrick becoming a matter of life and death
- players suffering week-in week-out, but still coming back for more
- clubs being secretly re-registered as " open access " asylums
- people suddenly discovering they do indeed have nasty bones inside their bodies
- all kinds of psychological and personality disorders manifesting themselves in great abundance
- quiet peace loving folk getting het up over nothing
- so much mental anguish ( and break-down ) as the price worth paying for the privilege to play
- the ridiculing of players' table misfortunes becoming every one's favourite occupation
- sane rational people turning into homicidal maniacs
- the most mediocre players running the teaching sessions
- long standing members being given sitting seats !
- players being hung, drawn and quartered for failing to count properly
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