AN OPEN LETTER TO DR. JOHN...............

Dear Doctor John,

Although you claim to be an innovative, pioneering psycho-analyst, who specialises in dealing with mentally unbalanced bridge players, I cannot find your name in any UK registers of licenced practitioners.

Moreover, as an EBU official for over 30 years I object to the way you seem to demonise players as being odd, abnormal, mentally disturbed, nasty, psychopathic, and in some instances darn right evil. You portray players in a dark and sinister way, picking up on the smallest character trait and exaggerating it to the point of vindictive ridicule.

Indeed, most of your labels are completely laughable, made up of psycho mumbo-jumbo, while the others appear to be borrowed from dodgy, unreliable, wacky internet sites.

I for one reject every single word you have ever written, and in my mind the only sick bastard in this world of bridge is you !

Yours Des. B. Lever

Dear Des,

Licenced practitioners are nothing more than blinkered automatons, who obediently follow and repeat the failed therapies of the past. Many of my bridge playing clients come to me because they have been let down by the " establishment " psychiatrists and psycho-analysts. Disillusioned as I was with all this establishment hogwash, I decided to set up and form my own school on alternative psycho-therapies. Having awarded myself its first honorary doctorate, I have educated many others to adopt the " Dr. John Way " of dealing with highly deranged individuals. These were dedicated followers who were prepared to invest tens of £'000's just to walk away with one of my graduation certificates.

As for my articles, which I might add appear both in The Lancet and the HBJ blog, I can assure you that they all reveal a harsh truth about the make up, personality traits, and mental problems experienced by bridge players the world over. I admit that the overall picture I paint of the bridge world is rather grim and extremely disturbing.........but the fact remains this beautiful game unfortunately brings out the" dark side " that lies deep within a player's psyche . Try to see bridge players as being " possessed " as a result of their willingness to let the game completely take over their lives. Or try to imagine them as being " infected by a bridge virus " which messes up their minds. This game somehow releases the beast in man in the same way as any one of the 7 deadly sins has done since the dawn of time.

As for my labels, I have earned the right to invent them since I was the first to spot and diagnose such disorders. Therefore, if you have failed to see players display symptoms I have associated with a particular condition, then you sir are blind. Or maybe you are living in a world of self-delusion ? Either way...you are like all the rest who choose to ignore my work......totally consumed by self-denial.

So if you choose to write me off as a charlatan then that is your right, but from the nature and tone of your comments, you more than anyone are clearly in need of my services.

Yours always charging ahead, Dr. John