Prof : Well Doctor...... what has caused you to turn your back on tournament bridge ?
Dr : Firstly, I find the whole expense thing far too much, and not being of a calibre to attract sponsors I find the prize money on offer absolutely pitiful. I ask you if 300 players are asked to pitch in £25 a head, stumping up £7500 in total, and the best they can offer as top prize money is around £400.....if your lucky.......the financial incentives are zero. In poker competitions.....I might add..... over half that money would end up in the pockets of the outright winner. It is not surprising then that tournament poker is on the way up whereas bridge is on the way down.
Prof : Any other reasons ?.............
Dr : Well, as you already know......... bad behaviour really bugs me....
Prof : What the bullying ?.................
Dr : No...no....something far worse than that. I'm talking about blatant hypocrisy and smugness. These are the greatest off-putters by a mile. Far too many players who rant on about the faults and misdemeanors of others are the biggest culprits themselves. And as always it is these same arseholes, who openly relish and bask in mirth whenever opponents make mechanical and unforced foolish errors. They laugh whenever opponents go down as a result of bad breaks, awful splits, and the unfortunate lie of the cards. Then to add insult to injury, they later congregate together in circles, bragging and chuckling away at the gifts that came they way. Who wants to encounter people like that.......not me for one.
Prof : Any other gripes concerning bad behaviour ?
Dr : Yes, I do believe that far too many players are guilty of elitism, intolerance, impatience , back-stabbing and petty mindedness.....
Prof : Some list....
Dr : Add to that slow play, complex bidding systems....... designed purely to baffle and obstruct the opponents' bidding....... and TD's being used to help those who cheat by exploiting the rules.....and you have a scenario that makes the world of tournament bridge a place I am happy to see the back off.
Prof : So where will you be playing your bridge now ?
Dr : Over at the Walnut Tree Allotment BC partnering Bigot-Johnson of course...........
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