INSIDE THE MIND OF A SERIAL BRIDGEMATE THROWER
( Dr.John talks to a leading criminologist , Professor Fuller Crapp )

Dr.J : Am I right to say that the only way to understand the outrageous actions of a serial bridgemate thrower is for you to go inside of mind of such a lunatic ?
Prof : Without a doubt....
Dr.J : And what will you expect to find inside his mind ?
Prof : Who knows ?
Dr. J : But I'm asking you because you're the one person who ought to know what makes this person behave like that
Prof : Well, it's more than likely I'm going to discover that this madman is nothing more than a pathetic loner
Dr. J : Hold on a mo....from my study of this individual he's a notorious womaniser, who also loves to go out on weekend benders with his drinking mates......not to mention his love of parties , social gatherings and orgies , where drinks are likely to be free. The man is reputed to be an ageing , out-going, gregarious, hedonistic playboy
Prof : Well in that case then ....I would expect to find this person being the victim of a tragic and troubled childhood , starved of emotional support and love.....a childhood perhaps blighted by constant bullying at school and rejection by his peers 
Dr. J : Not so....he had a happy, rampant childhood....one which many of us would envy. He was revered by all his followers and gang members, constantly attracting the attention of girls who knew how to give a young man a really good time. His devoted parents read all the books on how to bring up a fully grounded, well balanced , loving child. 
Prof : Oh dear ....this narrows it down to only one or two possible causes for these bridgemate tantrums. Either the man has an undiagnosed brain injury as a result of an accident , fall or attack .....or he has a genetic make up which dictates the bizarre way he behaves
Dr. J : Sorry to contradict your assumptions... but neither of those two possibilities apply. He has never suffered , as far as I know , any injury of any kind ,  relying on others to do carry out any dangerous and dirty work on his behalf , where health and safety risks are involved........ And what's more his exemplary behaviour is only undermined by occasional bouts impatience and intolerance , when forced to confront fools he has the misfortune to encounter. In fact the man is as normal as you and I....
Prof : Oh....then all this leaves me to conclude that there is only one characteristic of his mind left....worthy of consideration.....one which matches the highly disturbing trait .... all psychopathic bridge players are known to possess
Dr. J : And what's that ?
Prof : An alarming predisposition towards hurtling bridgemates with malice aforethought at players who need sharp , pointed reminders on the rules and ethics of the game.....a way of hammering home important messages... so to speak
Dr. J : Professor.....that was a truly brilliant analysis
Prof : I know...I know......


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