THE NORTHERN PRO GETS CONFRONTED AGAIN .......

-Northern Pro ……what is this National

 Grading System all about ?

-It’s a way of measuring your current

 performance taking into account the

 strength of your partners, and the

 quality of the field you were playing

 against

-Amazing……so how come I’m ranked

 as a QUEEN while you’re classed only

 as a NINE

-Listening muppet-head……I’m sacrificing

 my status by partnering inept and useless

 bunnies….who fail to grasp ….like you…..

 the finer points of my incredibly brilliant

 bidding system                                                               

-Oh…..the very same players… who when

 playing simple ACOL with me get some 

 cracking good scores…..now what does

 that tell us ?                                                                           

-Partner….have you any idea what it’s

 like to have your tongue ripped out…

 and your head beaten to a pulp with a

 hammer ?

-No…..

-Well…..I suggest you shut up and respect

 the fact that the game is not about results

 but more about the way my exquisitely crafted 

 and beautifully abstract bidding sequences

 involve countless alerts with overly complex                                                     

 explanations