SHOCKING TABLE CONFESSIONS THAT EXPOSE THE INIQUITY OF BIGOT-JOHNSON

" When I take that long to open 1NT you know I'm absolutely minimum......"
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" Partner, you oughta know by now that my 3 level pre-empts in the minors are made on filth "
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" Partner, did it never occur to you that East's double was based on a trump stack "
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 " That 2C opener of yours was the worst 23 count I have ever come across " 
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"  What this bridge world needs is more geniuses with humility......because let's bloody well face it there are so few of us left "
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" If I had been partnering anybody else I would have doubled "
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" Yes, we really do need to play that convention but best we leave it off the card "
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" Thank you partner for not pissing me off more than you normally do " 
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" Please get this into your thick head....when I said your game was average that was meant as a compliment "
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" The last thing I want to do is insult you........why it's first thing on my list of priorities "
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" Avoid bidding no trumps if you can......always leave that to me "
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" For pity's sake partner, watch out for my signals....especially the tiny finger ones "
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" Partner, we only use transfers when I open 1NT......."
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" Partner, don't you dare suggest you played your part.....why 58 of our 60% was all down to me "
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" Listen  lady I've told you before.....length is what matters "