TOY TOWN BC DISCIPLINARY HEARING No.62
The characters : Chairman ... Clockwork Mouse
                         Secretary.....Miss Prim
                         Complainant :  Bumpy Dog
                         The Accused ....Big Ears
                         Witness .....Mr. Wobbly Man
                   
                     
Clockwork Mouse : In this letter of complaint , Big Ears , you are accused of being an eavesdropper,  because you were listening in to comments made about a board , which was heading its way towards your table
Big Ears : Who made this outrageous accusation ?
Clockwork Mouse : Bumpy Dog
Big Ears : And what else did he say about me ?
Clockwork mouse : That you have you monstrous ears ....the size of barn doors.....which can pick up any conversation from anywhere the room.....even from tables in faraway corners.
And what's more Bumpy Dog claims your ears function like antennae , capable of tuning in to any sound waves no matter how faint.....such as the dropping of a pin. Finally , he has labelled you as a serial eavesdropper
Big Ears : He's barking mad....and should be put down. The man has made a defamatory comment about me, which in my book warrants censure and expulsion from this club
Miss Prim : What needs to be put down..... on record..... is that eavesdropping is a serious form of cheating , which certainly needs to be clamped down upon
Big Ears :  Hold on a moment......I heard the comments he made about the board in question , because it was impossible for me not to hear them. Bumpy's loud yapping voice is one which can penetrate even the thickest of walls ....he's so loud surely everyone would have heard him  
Miss Prim : But would everyone have registered the contents of the comments ?
Big Ears : How would I know ?   
Miss Prim : I call Mr. Wobbly Man as Bumpy's first witness......
Mr. Wobbly Man : Yes.... I'm here
Miss Prim : Do you recall the night in question ?
Mr. Wobbly Man : Yes I do
Miss Prim: Did you at any time hear any comments made by Bumpy Dog ?
Mr. Wobbly Man : No I didn't....I would be too busy concentrating on what was happening at my table
Miss Prim : Well Big ears.....there you have it.....it's only you who somehow tunes in to other table conversations...... but no one else
Big Ears : Have you asked other members.... present that night....... if they heard Bumpy yapping away ?
Miss Prim : We did.....and none of them could recall hearing his voice..... let alone the contents of his remarks
Big Ears : As you well know eavesdropping involves secretly listening in.....without anyone knowing that you are doing so.......but I told the TD about what I heard which proves the opposite. I wasn't acting secretly.... and there was no intent to seek... and then use..... unauthorised information to my advantage. Once I obtained details about the board , I told the TD in no uncertain terms  that I couldn't possibly play that hand. You see..... ethics matter to me a great deal
Clockwork mouse : What matters to you are results. By refusing to play that board you had two objectives in mind. Firstly , you were hoping to get bumpy dog into trouble. Secondly , by having already run up an average 65% on the boards previously played , you were looking to get a 65% average on the board in question..... without ever having to play the board.
Big ears : Can't you appreciate the fact..... I was denying myself the opportunity to get a top...
Clockwork Mouse : Yes...as well as a bottom....but being a results merchant.....a guaranteed above average score on the board is what matters most
Big Ears : Nevertheless , calling me an eavesdropper implies that I am a cheat.....which is not the case .....Heaven's above....I can't help it if I'm gifted with acute hearing
Clockwork Mouse : Might I suggest then... the wearing of ear muffs ?
Big Ears : You sir can go and get stuffed
Clockwork Mouse : Something you should have done with your ears....
Big Ears : I'm off
Miss Prim : Permanently I hope....