( The other day I , Bigot-Johnson , was on a roll. For once Lady Luck was on my side and my partner and I spent the whole evening walking on water. Could anything go wrong ? Well....up came board 4 on which I picked up.... x....K109xxx....xxxxx....A......and as the auction proceeded these were the thoughts that raced through my head )
1S (by RHO) : .........Typical......yet another miserable collection of HCPs but at least my hand's got shape
Double : I know it's naughty..... since we've got Michaels down on our system's cards.....but hey, this bid certainly doesn't give the opponents a clue about my shape.....or lack of HCPs....and what's more.... there's a 2 in 3 chance partner has a fit with me in the red suits.
4S : Bugger me.....I guess my frisky double didn't put them off one bloody jot.....if this gets passed out , I could still try an even friskier 4NT , but at this vulnerability it would be the act of a mad man. As for defence , it is possible for partner to turn up with the Ace of hearts.... giving us the first 4 tricks......club Ace, heart Ace, club ruff, and then the King of hearts as the setting trick. Ah well, there is some hope...
5C : Oh my God....I'm doomed.....this contract could be a total screw up , especially when I can only provide one certain trick.....THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU BID LIKE A PRAT !! Somebody get me a brown paper bag to put over my head......
Pass : What a wimp ......can't he see we're in a barrel load of trouble......surely , they must have the majority of points....and defensive tricks to boot.......I certainly daren't pull it and if 4S is making , then 6 off undoubled is still a reasonable score
Pass : Please God don't let my LHO double.....otherwise I'm in a right pickle as to what to do for the best......may be a SOS redouble is an option asking partner to bid her longest red suit....Jesus this is disaster about to happen.....and it's all down to me
Pass : What the hell is going on here.....have the opponents lost the plot ? Do they subscribe to the mantra not to compete to the 5-level ? Are they fearful of doubling, allowing us run to a superior red suit contract ? Or they are gutless yellow-bellies ? Who cares.........I'm pretty certain 4S is making......
With 5C the final contract , West opening lead was the K of spades , followed by the Ace. " What the hell was this magical thinking all about ? Did he want declarer to use up the Ace of clubs as a ruff thereby promoting a club honour ( or two ) if East held the queen ? " I was witnessing a farce with absolute disbelief. After ruffing the second spade, partner crossed to her Ace of hearts and proceeded to rattle off her 8 club tricks. " Yes.....miracles do happen at the bridge table. " By now the defenders were completely shell shocked. So much so East came down to the jack of hearts and the Ace of diamonds , allowing declarer to take the last two tricks with dummy's K10 of hearts. This was the full hand :
Would you Adam and Eve it.....plus 620 .....and our good fortune didn't stop there either.......it carried on all night .
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