Dear Readers ,
The moment you entered the bizarre world of bridge , you unfortunately declared yourself as a "potential clients " for money grabbing psycho-analysts , who were wisely setting up practices in your local neighbourhoods .
When I first visited my local bridge club I quickly realised what a lucrative source of business I had fortuitously stumbled upon. Never in my life had I seen so many people under the same roof needing my services . Almost everyone I met or observed " had problems " , which left unattended would have required me at stage to have quite a few sectioned under the Mental Health Act.
But what was even more amazing was the vast array of different syndromes , complexes , phobias and other psychological/personality disorders that only related to bridge players . Indeed , the more I researched into this phenomenon the more I realised that it was the game itself that brought on, and exacerbated , the symptoms of their disturbing afflictions. Bridge was clearly a mind changing drug , which simply triggered their inner demons to run rampant and take control. So part of my ongoing training , as with many other caring practioners , involved taking up a religious oath in order to practice exorcism .
Tragically , only a few sufferers ever stepped forward me begging for help , willing and able to acknowledge their deteriorating and highly embarrassing conditions . Others were brought kicking and screaming to my surgery by concerned friends and relatives , but always choosing to remain in stubborn self-denial .
So I beg you to look at yourself as a bridge player and recognise the quirky , unusual and odd behaviours you have adopted since taking up this game . Accept the reality that bridge clubs are mad houses and theatres of the absurd. Therefore , by looking back at and reviewing my numerous posts , you can to some extent undertake a self-diagnosis , which could well be the starting point for your recovery.
Yours touting as always for business, Dr. John
No comments:
Post a Comment