Thursday, 5 September 2013

LITTLE KNOWN FACTS ABOUT BRIDGE PLAYERS ( OR SHOULD I SAY SHOCKING )...... Research by Dr. Sigmund T. Schukelgruber 

1.  49%  of bridge players under the age of 40 would prefer to give up sex for a week than  
     miss a night of bridge
2.  86 % of male players are resistant to taking any advice on how to improve their game
3.  97 % of players react badly to losing
4.  40 % of older male players have lost the ability ( or know how ) to undo bras
5.  66 % of all male players have lost the art of conversation unless of course the topic is
     about a bridge related matter
6.  Only 0.005 % of all bridge players can actually play the game with real skill and ability
7.  Of the 80% who cheat at bridge in one form or another , half remain oblivious to their 
     transgressions , while the rest hide from the truth through self-denial and/or self-
     delusion
8.  92% of the membership expect their club to give them everything , but they are not
     prepared in return to give anything back in return except for their paltry subscriptions
     and table monies
9.  Of the 5% who get actively involved in committee work, the vast majority vehemently   
     endorse the virtues of nepotism and despotism
10. 72 % of bridge players in England qualify for state pension 
11. For the unfortunate few, 96 % of the time at the table involves them waiting for others to
      figure out what to bid or which card to play next 
12. Despite the vast differences in ability,  99.9% of all long standing bridge players either
      view or define themselves as " experts "
13. During any review of a bad board 82% will always lay the blame firmly on their partners 
14. A typical club player places around 40,000 cards onto the table each year, of which  
      80% he/she will be aimlessly following suit 
15. 73 % of all rank and file members bid and play the cards out of force of habit as
      opposed to intuitive thinking
16. Ask a male bridge player about which is his " best hand " and around 99% will wax
      lyrical about a particular deal

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