REBECCA ROOD'S MAILBAG ........................................................................................

Dear Rebecca, As the one and only bridge Agony Aunt who I can trust to give me a straight and honest answer, I would welcome your views over this particular matter. The other evening at the club, I was told out of the blue that I was "a very rude person". So, as there was no obvious contextual backdrop to provide me with a satisfactory definition of the word, I now ask for your opinion. Was it criticism or not? I get confused when my dictionary defines the word as both "ignorant" and "robust/healthy".

Please use your superior education and wide contacts to help me come to terms with the above comment, gratuitous and shocking as it was.

Yours politely..............................Bolshy Brian

Dear Brian,

There should be no doubt about the meaning of the word "rude" given the context of a bridge club, and the type of behaviour one expects to experience there.

So be honest with yourself and accept the choice of word as being a sharp but well meant criticism, which could encompass one or more of the follwing possible meaings, as flagged up in Roget's Thesaurus: coarse, gross, boorish, tactless, unrefined, vulgar, uncouth, "bolshy", ungentle, impolite, ill-mannered, uncivil, un-gentlemanlike, horrid, unseemly, shocking, ungracious, unaccommodating, un-complaisant, gruff, churlish, bearish, crusty (crackng word that), snappish, peevish, grumpy, petulant, cantankerous, intractable, scowling, moody, loutish, ignorant.

Surely, one of the above might accurately reflect your chosen bridge demeanour? But might I suggest that you ask the person concerned to expand upon his statement..... to tell you exactly what he intended his version of "rude" to mean. He could either identify the closest synonym from the above list, or perhaps include one of his own.

As for my own pseudonym "Rood", I set out from the off to distance myself from all the above meanings, making sure that the name would only be associated with the following connotations, namely: blunt, never one to mince words, plain-speaking, unreserved, candid, veracious, straight-forward, uncompromising, unflattering, free-spoken, someone who calls a spade a spade.

Yours knowing how to be "Rood" ......but still respected and revered.........Rebecca