Saturday, 18 February 2012

BRIDGE PLAYERS' GREATEST FEARS ....... ( Research by Professor Hu Chi Ku Chi )

It has now come to light that bridge players spend a disproportionate amount of time, sitting at the tables,  consumed by a multitude of fears.  In some cases  the extent of these fears caused many to turn a deathly shade of white, and/or shake uncontrollable in a panic-stricken way. So when my dedicated team of researchers conducted a survey, they placed the following anxieties ( from a list of well over 100 ) as the top 25 :
1. Playing badly
2. Losing badly
3. Going down in a crucial but otherwise straightforward contract
4. Being held responsible for the team's defeat
5. Being ditched from the team as the proverbial weak link
6. Moving a bridgemate in an untoward way and being caught out
7. Falling easy prey to opponents' well laid traps and psychs
8. Scoring less than 40%
9. Coming last in a very big field
10. Coming last in a field of rabbits
11. Being associated with the wrong 2 %
12. Asking someone for a game and being rejected
13. Being told by partner that this was indeed his last game with you
14. Making the only lead which gifted the opponents the contract 
15. Discovering an extremely nasty trump break
16. Having a TD called over by outraged opponents
17. Having a top converted by the TD into an outright bottom
18. Entering up 3H+4 when every other pair in the room bid and made slam
19. Being slagged off by partner in front of others
20. Being talk about in a derogatory way, even though you are standing nearby
21. Going for 3400 !
22. Throwing away the wrong card on a pseudo-squeeze
23. Being stared at by an intimidating opponent
24. Incurring a 2 trick penalty through a careless revoke
25. Going absent for 4 months only to discover no one missed you

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