BRIDGE BLOGGING.......... ( Article by Bridgemeister Gibson )

As I see it, there are at least 7 types of bridge bloggers. Those who want to ....

- tell stories focusing on their own trials and tribulations

- report on, and review, big hands, big performers and big matches

- discuss problem hands ( real or imaginary ) with regards to bidding, defence and declarer play scenarios

- advocate or review new conventions, signalling methods and complex squeeze plays

- reminisce about the great old days, the colourful characters they encountered, with fascinating and amusing anecdotes

- raise serious and/or controversial issues, hoping to open up both useful discussion and debate

- satirise the absurdities, contradictions, hypocrisies and stereo-type characters which many players still fail to recognise

However, with respect to the last two categories of blog writers, who I might add are in a real minority, they need specials qualities. Firstly, they have to bold and brave, being quite aware that they might upset and offend quite a few people in the process. Secondly, they have to make sure their factual content is based on truth, and their opinions based on sound analysis and argument, especially if they are to convince a sceptical readership. Thirdly, they have to be risk-takers by entering into uncharted territories where few have gone before........knowing that navigational mistakes are always a distinct possibility.

As I belong to Bigot-Johnson's team of blog writers, I have found it necessary to come up with a code of conduct to protect my precarious position :

1. Avoid quoting facts which you can not substantiate or support

2. When giving opinions, no matter how extreme, try to ensure that they are (i) not motivated by malice , (ii )based on fair comment, being genuine and honest views

3. Never get too personal, choosing instead to keep individuals and groups unidentified and unnamed whenever it seems prudent to do so. Any resemblances made should be restricted to a small group of readers who are already in the know, and very much aware of your tongue-in-cheek approach......and who most likely share the same points of view

4. Avoid being completely one-sided with your opinions, looking to give a more balanced overview wherever possible. In every contentious and controversial issue, there are always different schools of thought, and different ways of looking at, and resolving problems.

5. Accept the reality regarding the laws of probability in that mistakes might well be made, and that certain lines may have been crossed. In such circumstances, corrections and apologies will need to humbly made.

6. Endeavour to stick to the principles you initially adopted to apply in your writing , remaining true to all of them as best you can.

7. Beware of those who make comments contravening the above rules 1-6 .

Contradictions will expose you as someone guilty of both double-standards and hypocrisy....in other words a fraud.

The Howard Bigot-Johnson blog is certainly one that has attempted to push the boundaries of bridge literature into new areas. These initiatives involve over-lapping bridge topics into other academic disciplines such as law, psychology and philosophy. Moreover, some of the posts try to move bridge into the theatres of the absurd, where humour and surrealism dominate. The whole blog attempts to get readers to see bridge in a completely different light....even if most of the content comes across as dark.

Indeed, Howard Bigot-Johnson tries to be the Wolynski of the bridge world, desperate to mould himself in the image of America's finest blogger.

BC SUB-COMMITTEE DISCIPLINARY HEARING No.141..........

( As usual Bigot-Johnson was in trouble again having upset his female partner on the way back from a bridge match way up north. A short extract from the hearing's transcript appears below. )

Chairman : We have summoned you here today to respond to a complaint from Ms. X, who claims that she agreed to be your partner in the Portland Mixed Pairs final held at Harrogate last month on condition you did the driving.

B-J : Correct.....

Chairman : She also claims that on the way back you pulled into a pub restaurant near Leeds , whereupon you ordered a slap up meal with wine to celebrate your top four finish.

B-J : Correct......

Chairman : But was it not the case that during the meal you consumed a glass of wine with your pinkie sticking out ?

B-J : Chairman.....please........ let's get real here.......there can hardly be anything wrong with that ! In some circles it is regarded as the height of good manners to drink wine with your little finger sticking out ......

Chairman : Who said anything about your little finger ? ...........

BIGOT'S COURT APPEARANCE MAKES LOCAL NEWS ...... ( An abridged report taken from the Bawtry Farmers' Gazette )

Bigot-Johnson, a regular player at the Walnut Tree Allotment BC, appeared before Doncaster Crown Court charged with causing grievous bodily harm ( with intent ) to Percy Pantopod, a fellow club member. Just before the judge directed the jury to go away and return a verdict, he turned to Bigot to ask if he had any final words to say to the court.

Bigot, who had elected to conduct his own defence, stood up and replied : " M'Lud....may I just bring to the court's attention once again, that what I did to Percy was out of chivalry and good manners. Since when was it a crime to open a door to help him pass through ? "

The judge looked long and hard at Bigot before pointing out a critical observation. " I'm not disputing the fact you opened the door for Percy to make his timely exit, but I think you are overlooking the fact that the car you were travelling in was doing 70 mph at the time....."

Not surprisingly Bigot was found guilty. only to be given a 180 hour community service order to teach bridge to delinquent kids banged up in a nearby remand centre.

LATEST BRIDGE BOOKS TO HIT THE SHOPS....... ( Research By Pun )

• Never Never Pull My Penalty Doubles, Partner.......Noah Count
• Please Don't Bury Me With All Your Conventions ....Ava Lanche
• The Easy Way To Read Opponents' Cards.................Lee N. Wellover
• Why Is It Always My Neck On The Block..................Gill O' Teen
• He Retired From Bridge As Junior World Champion...Sasha Waist
• Just Because I Called Him A Cheat..........................Enoch Mee-Downe
• That Man Abuses All The Lady Members.................Ray Pennybody
• She's His Favourite Partner Alright But....................Woody Poker
• I've Had A Shocking Week Of Dismal Results............Gladys Friday
• I Could Play 60 Hands A Day...................................Anne Moore

ARE TOURNAMENT DIRECTORS BIASED ?.......... ( Research By Professor Hu Chi Ku Chi )

No more than any other man or woman so it seems, since we all possess an inclination to present or hold a partial perspective at the expense of ( possibly equally valid ) alternatives.

Inherent biases lie deep within our psyches constantly undermining the way we perceive things, process our thoughts and reach conclusions. Indeed, this form of cognitive bias is the inevitable outcome of human thought, an unfortunate trait of the human condition. This tendency compels us to make systematic errors in certain circumstances, where cognitive factors, rather than evidence, dictate the way information is processed. Heuristics is the science which attempts to examine where this information process encounters either short-cuts or short-circuits.

To malign tournament directors as " biased " is nothing more than bias itself, with a huge dollop of hypocrisy thrown in for good measure. Because one indisputable truth exists: it is impossible for anyone to eliminate bias and other reasoning errors from their decision making process.

For TDs , and the rest of us, this tendency to think and act in a biased way has been nurtured from the day we were born. The tragedy is however is that we all fail to recognise this failing, because it is so implicit. It exists outside our conscious minds, beyond our awareness. It is the product of culture and life experiences. Which family members and friends we attached ourselves to most ? What values sets we were exposed to and aspirations we were encouraged to adopt ? However, some of us may have been brought up in a diverse world, which created the best chance of all to eliminate the influences of a single and corrupting cultural bias.

In the cut and thrust world of tournament bridge, bias will raise its head in one of several ways:

- Observational bias....where there is a tendency to look at something from just one particular point of view

- Confirmation bias .... where the only observation accepted is the one which conforms to the observers pre-selected expectations and desires

" Cargo-cult science " bias.....which directs the individual to interpret information to support his/her favourite hypothesis

- Processing bias - which involves people using selective data only to justify and/or draw their preferred conclusions

This means that in the heated arenas of bridge tournaments, where table conflicts run rife, tempers frayed, and claims met with counter-claims, even the merest hint of bias from the TD will exacerbate these difficult situations even more. TD's are on a hiding to nothing. Their only hope of escaping accusations of bias requires them to adopt and follow these simple rules ( as advocated by the American FBI to their investigating officers ) :

1. Remain open minded

2. Stay open to different viewpoints, interpretations, and possible solutions

3. Avoid the tendency to decide on a course of action..... and then search selectively for confirming data to support that decision

4. Examine the available and relevant evidence objectively, before making any decision

5. Avoid judging any book by its cover

6. Don't presume or imagine that the individual under scrutiny is a villain or a threat

7. Don't allow emotions such as anger, guilt and fear to impair common sense and good judgement

8. Be prepared to stand corrected, and seek out second opinions where necessary

In other words TDs need to take on the role of disinterested outsiders. This means also trying to pre-empt what questions they would ask, what information they would seek, and what assumptions they would adopt at the start ?

I'm sure that out there in the world of bridge there are many knowledgeable TDs, who strive to give both book and judgement rulings with as much impartiality and objectivity as they possibly can. Nevertheless the complete elimination of bias, as all philosophers, commentators and psychologists will confirm, is impossible.

We as players have to accept the reality of the human condition, live with whatever rulings we get, and move onto the next board.

QUESTION : DO BRIDGE

PLAYERS SLEEP AT

NIGHT ?

....

....

....

ANSWER : NOT WHEN

THEY REALISE THAT

SLAMS MISSED WERE

THERE TO BE BID AND

MADE !!!

PHILOSOPHICAL REFLECTIONS ON BRIDGE..... ( By Professor Hu Chi Ku Chi )

As bridge players we all have an inner compass that directs us to go about the play of a hand in a particular way. For the majority of us this inner compass is always out of sync , but thankfully it can be corrected by every book we read, and every outside mind that shows us a better way to bid and play the cards. However, once we stop absorbing and listening to good advice, the oscillation gradually dies down, and the needle returns to its old orientation. This is an inherent trait of the human condition : retreating back to our old wayward habits.

The harsh reality is that one can only absorb so much, and take on board the wisdom of others. Saturation thresholds are quickly reached, and from this new static position we then venture out, far less certain and confident of our bearings. As a result we inevitably wind our way back to the comfort zones of familar territory , where once again our inadequate inner compass regains control .

BUFFETT CUP HAND POSES NO PROBLEMS FOR JOHNNY................

The other day I gave Johnny Supremo a slam hand reported to have been bid and been made at all the tables.

I told Johnny that as South, he would be looking at Q84....J4......AKQJ954......J, while his partner held A1062....AK....10732.....A106. Not surprisingly, all these top class pairs reached 6D, despite West coming in at the start with a take-out double of South's 1D opening bid. So how should the hand be played after West kicks off with the king of clubs as his opening lead ? Here is Johnny's answer :

" Well, West surely to God for his bid must have most if not all of the outstanding points. One option is to take the trick in dummy with the Ace and ruff a club with jack of diamonds, cross to dummy's 10 of diamonds, and ruff the last club with the queen. If there's an outstanding diamond, I would clear that before eliminating hearts and coming back to hand with another diamond. All that is needed now is to find West with king/jack of spades and it's all over, by simply leading up to dummy's 10 of spades.

However, a simple throw in will also work. Take the club Ace, ruff dummy's club 6 , and draw 2 rounds of trumps. After that play the Ace/king of hearts to clear the suit, and then exit with dummy's 10 of clubs ( pitching a spade ) putting West on lead. He of course is totally fixed, unable to play a club or heart for fear of a ruff and a second spade discard. So his best bet is to play a spade and pray. No chance there with declarer happily making his twelfth trick with the spade queen. This is the near certain line I would take. "

So I asked the great man " Are there any other lines that could be taken ".

" Yes ", he said " If you like to play with real style, finesse and aplomb. A squeeze looks certainly well on, if West holds all these key black cards. All one needs to do is a duck on the king of clubs, in order to rectify the count. From this point on West is fixed again. He will certainly switch to a safe heart, enabling declarer to rattle off the next 9 tricks : club Ace, 2 top hearts, and 6 diamonds. West of course will now come down to KJ of spades and the King of clubs. Dummy will sitting on the A10 of spades and the club 10. So with Q8 of spades in hand and me to play my last diamond, West might just as well go out the room at shoot himself, for he has no reply. So tell me..... did anyone choose this line of play ? "

" Only one...I believe.....a Canadian-American by the name of Fred Gitelman..... ".

Johnny just smiled.............

THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY REVISITED.............

• Balance : something you find hard to do after one too many doubles
• Isolated menace : a term Bigot-Johnson once coined after locking up the irritant, Percy Pantopod, in the club's downstairs sound-proofed wine cellar
• Safety play : the process of taking all necessary precautions against (i) king-size cock ups, (ii) careless slips, and (iii) getting into trouble
• Spread : what hungry inter-city team players wish for but never get, when the half-time tea interval only provides a limited number of small cheese sandwiches and sausage rolls
• Trick light : one that can be switched on and off by the click of one's fingers
• Three down : a term used by those looking to remove undesirables from the club. Often the statement is completed by "....... two to go ".
• Onosecond : the minuscule fraction of time it takes you to realize you've just played the wrong card. This type of calamitous mistake is always accompanied by the words " Oh no ......."
• Handicap teams : a competition where every top seeded team is required to field at least one complete idiot in their line up

PHILOSOPHICAL REFLECTIONS ON BRIDGE..... ( By Professor Hu Chi Ku Chi )

In this bizarre world of bridge, I have seen many men who have a good deal of the dog or the fox, the bull or the snake about them, yet rarely do they achieve anything in the way of success despite being blessed with these special qualities. Indeed, it is equally rare for them to accept defeat with human dignity and grace given their lycanthropic characteristics. However, there are some players who excel at the game, forever displaying faces enriched with smug satisfaction, which so often comes from repeated success. These fortunate few owe much of their sucesss to the fact they are only possessed by the fox..... and the snake.......and nothing else.

WOLYNSKI'S VIEW ON BLOGGING.......( By bridgemeister Gibson )

" Sometimes I have to stop and think why I blog - it's not like hundreds of thousands will ever flock to my little shack in the cyberspace universe. I suppose I use it as a scrapbook for my thoughts - but why even make my thoughts public ? There's no money in it, can't lead to anything. Blogging is for blow-hards with nothing better to do. "

Well, to a large extent I agree with her, but if blogs live on long after our deaths, then I'm comforted by the thought that our spirits and thoughts hang around for a bit longer........... for future generations to reflect on, and perhaps be amused by. Humour is a wonderful thing. It can take away a negative mood or feeling if only for a few fleeting seconds. But in a world where joy and happiness are being squeezed away by the crushing vice of stress and chaos, then those fleeting seconds of amusement provide a much welcome respite. Far too many bridge players allow their beloved game to make them miserable rather than contented and cheerful .

BRIDGE BOOKS TO TAKE YOUR BREATH AWAY............. ( Gasps Pun )

• Partner, Why Overdo The Facial Expressions ?...........Jemima Lott
• Her Best Bridge Days Are Long Gone..........................Diane Duck
• There Are People In This Club Out To Get Me..............Ken Iving
• If You're Out Of Your Depth, Cry For Help...................Aaron C. Reskew
• He Rarely Gives Anything Away.................................Titus Canby
• Howe I Make My Money As A Pro...............................Selma Bodie
• Scottish Bridge Players Tend To Mess Around.............Fanny A. Boot
• Bridge Reporting At Its Worst.................................Tobias Coveridge
• Looking Out For Easy Tricks........................................Dick Everard
• Catty Players Don't Bother Me.....................................Leon Taymer

LAW REPORT : WALNUT TREE ALLOTMENT BC V. THE CARDINALS BC ( 2010 )

( This most unusual case came up before a High Court judge, after an appeal was lodged by the plaintiffs who had failed in their initial attempt to secure a County Court injunction. The pursuit of this injunction was to stop the Cardinals from setting up a separate invitation-only bridge club, which would then target members of the Walnut Tree Allotment BC as paying customers. In addition, damages were sought on behalf of the plaintiffs to compensate any loss of revenue from reduced table money if any of their members had elected to play away. The judgement given can be seen below . )

" Several questions need to be addressed. For instance, is it a cardinal sin for WTABC members to set up a rival bridge club competing for the same custom ? Does this action warrant the court's intervention ? Moreover, is there a conflict of interests, when the WTABC secretary also happens to one of the holy trinity of proprietors ? And finally, would a once a month night of bridge have any detrimental effect on the Walnut Tree revenues on evenings where players exercised their choice over these two alternative venues ?

So although I find bridge club disputes very petty, tedious and tiresome, I have given these questions a great deal of thought and consideration.

Firstly, I do not see within the club's constitution any reference to a restriction whereby members must desist from any activity that could be viewed as a conflict of interests. The whinging plaintiffs need to recognise that we live in a free society which welcomes and embraces freedom of association and congregation. It is not uncommon to see break-away splinter groups forming new bridge clubs, or new ones just appearing on the scene to fill gaps in the market. Each club no doubt offers welcome alternatives and options for bridge playing enthusiasts. Moreover, it is not uncommon to see some players actively looking to join several clubs in order to provide themselves with unlimited options and choices. To thwart the Cardinals' honorable intentions by way of a tacky and ill-considered injunction would be an abuse of the legal system.

The next issue , I agree , is a little more contentious in that the Secretary does have a foot in both camps. But is there a real and genuine conflict of interests ? Does her role in one organisation undermine her standing and role in another ? Does her support and enthusiasm to promote an alternative monthly venue undermine her commitment, work rate, and dedication, as club secretary, to act in the best interests of her home club ? I think not. The two entities are not strictly in competition with each other. From any reasonable perspective, the two clubs are much more akin to an amalgamation and merger. Her combined commitment and energy to see both clubs enjoying success is to be commended, not doubted. She is a saint.

Looking at the reality of the situation, the CBC intends to operate only on one Friday in the month. It's sole focus is on fun, food, and friendly bridge. The 3 "F's ". The evidence is clear that with food included the Cardinals offer a unique experience which is not available at the Walnut Tree . This all inclusive bridge experience is exclusive to them. It fills a gap in the market providing Walnut Tree members and other invitees with that special party experience. In my view, there's no risk whatsoever that this alternative venue will diminish membership numbers at the Walnut Tree : in fact the opposite may be true. By providing a good experience for all those that turn up, rave word-of-mouth reviews might encourage invitees to become members of both clubs or to play more at both clubs on a regular basis . Far from there being a conflict of interests. it is far more likely that mutually beneficial interests will be created. Naturally, when a private club is restricted anyway to hiring rooms with a limit of 12 tables, an invitation only arrangement is both sensible and appropriate, if only to guarantee that perfect blend of social harmony and bonhomie. Because let's face it, it makes sense for each and every bridge club to exercise their right to keep the riff raff away.

As to the question of whether the Walnut Tree has suffered financially, whenever the Cardinals have a do, there may be an argument that supports that view. This, however, solely depends on how many of the invitees who elected to go the Cardinals are regular attenders of the Walnut Tree. I suspect the numbers are a very few indeed. Moreover, given the fact a large group of players belong to other clubs demonstrates the fact that people like to have alternative choices. Just because I am a M&S credit card club member doesn't mean I can't shop at Sainsbury's.

So having been invited along with my wife to the next Cardinals' do, which I might add we are both really looking forward to, I have no hesitation in dismissing this appeal.

A POEM BY DR. SIGMUND T. SCHUKELGRUBER........ ( Entitled " The Bridge Blog Reader's Lament " )

There's so much out there

Too much to choose

Time is so precious

There's no time to lose

So if I'll read one today

And leave the rest for others

I can binge on Sunday

If I'm not at my mothers

But as for the bloggers

How do they keep going ?

Is their stuff read by many ?

There's no way of knowing

Yes I have a few favourites

They're all friends of mine

To ignore them for others

Means crossing that line

But there is one exception

A blog so bizarrre

A Bigot-Johnson creation

A new cyberspace star

His take on the bridge world

Is cutting and sharp

I love all of his characters

Especially Carp

Yet if I read all his posts

It would take me a year

But staying glued to a screen

Is my innermost fear

Yes, I need to break free

And to quit reading blogs

Because as a bridge junkie

My life's gone to the dogs

I need lots of new challenges

To live life to the full

To converse with real people

No matter how dull

With places to visit

There's lots to choose

But time is against me

So no time to lose

HOW TO WRITE A SATIRICAL BRIDGE BLOG..... ( By Carp )

Satire and lampoon is the ridicule or derision of particular vices or idiosyncrasies found in the allegedly bizarre world you wish to explore. The purpose of course is to create irony and humour, with the intent of bringing about shame and/or change of behaviour with regards to those guilty of wrongdoing. Although satire can be seen as cruel it can still serve its purpose by employing a strong sense of wit. So what are the requirements or steps to follow, in order to put together a good satirical article ?

1. Find a topic that makes your blood boil. Ideally, the topic should be naturally ironic or ridiculous, where it becomes easy to identify any absurdity, hypocrisy and contradiction that exists.
2. If it involves an individual find a quote or an action which exposes this person in a light befitting the evidence presented. Moreover, if the silly bugger has shot him/herself in the foot, or has displayed hypocrisy that almost beggars belief, then go for the jugular.
3. If necessary put words into the person's mouth for best results, by starting off with a direct quote but taking it forward in a completely new direction. Adding a few extra words to create a more comical effect is a standard but cunning ploy.
4. If an incident involves several individuals, then you are well placed to create a more complex piece of satire. By adding a few more fictional characters to the plot, you can add more colour and drama to your observations which readers will find extremely amusing.
5. Always broaden your range of attack, which means course many more people becoming legitmate targets.
6. But satire is best achieved if you can adopt a literary style which readers will respect and appreciate.
7. Avoid " actionable malice " in your satire if you want to avoid any legal actions against you for defamation. Never name names, keep everything fairly anonymous, and use make-believe characters wherever possible.......but keep enough resemblance for your readers to understand exactly where you are coming from. However you must remember, the primary focus of any satirist is to amuse and entertain readers, as opposed to just slagging off institutions and people you dislike.
8. Always use hyperbole, since an exaggeration of a truth can hardly be a lie. Hyperbole is a clever literary device that exaggerates facts within the boundaries of acceptability. Sometimes it is necessary to highlight the facts in such a way that the absurdity you wish to expose becomes blatantly obvious.
9. Attempt to use irony to help you tell a story, since clearer messages can often be made by using words and phrases which suggest the exact opposite of what you really mean to say . There is nothing wrong in using sarcasm to criticise or condemn wrongful behaviour..... and injustice.
10. Humour is fine, but not all satire has to be funny. Occasionally, you will need to point out the ridiculous elements of a situation ( or person ) with a hard-hitting and shocking truth. Ceratain facts may need to be brought out into the open, to bring people over to your way of thinking or to make a point in a quicker and more obvious way. Often satire is the only way to get readers to see the absurdity of a situation, which would otherwise elude them.

TIME FOR A CHANGE : SO LET'S BRING ON EVEN MORE OSCARS ....... ( A cheeky but hard-hitting follow-up article by Carp )

Almost a year ago I bravely and boldly suggested Oscar type trophies should be handed out to club players who managed to achieve great things other than winning a club competition. These gold plated Oscar awards ( at no expense spared ) would enable dozens of players to have a stab at glory no matter how pathetic and wretched they were at bridge. So here are a few more suggestions for club committees to ponder over, if they want to consider handing out more prestigious awards at their next AGM or prize-giving ceremony:

- The ITCHING POWDER award for the player who has proved himself to be the club's biggest irritant, forever getting under every one's skin

- The ALICE IN WONDERLAND award should go to the committee member who clearly operates in a fantasy world, turning all committee meetings into Mad Hatter's tea parties

- The BLACK DEATH award for the player who no one wants to partner or play against

- The PIGGY-WIGGY award for the most objectionable player, well renown for his/her constant grunting, snorting, and sticking-their-nose-in-where-it's-not-wanted antics

- The LEMMING award which recognises the incredible achievement of a player who has pushed the self-destruct button more times than anyone else, with his suicidal overcalls, and reckless overbidding

- The OSTRICH award which can only be given out to themselves, if there's evidence to show that they ( the committee ) have developed an uncanny knack of burying their heads in the sand, whenever a big or awkward problem comes along

- The BIG EARS award for the player whose listening skills are second to none, tuned in at all times to loose conversations about boards just played on nearby tables.... which of course are heading his/her way

- The LADLE award for the club member who has done that much stirring, the club has been deluged with malicious gossip and scandal-mongering rumours on a scale never seen before

- The BARE FACE CHEEK award which should be handed out to the club's biggest and most outrageous hypocrite, who never in a month of Sundays practises what he/she preaches

- The POISON GAS CANISTER award for the player who has shown a natural talent to create an unpleasant atmosphere wherever he/she goes, antagonising and provoking others, and drawing them into awkward and difficult conflict situations

- The FROZEN RABBIT award for the most pathetic and timid player of the year who, if asked to perform on the big stage and put under the glare of the spot-lights, instantly becomes paralysed with fear and dread as to what to do next

- The WHITE STICK award which should be given out to the most biased TD at the club, who is unable to see the right course of action to take, choosing instead to be blinded by his/her own deeply seated prejudices against players considered inferior and therefore unworthy of justice

- The BROWN TONGUE award for the biggest arse-licker of the year, famed for sucking up to those in power and privileged positions, pompous sorts who spend most of their time talking crap

- The DUMB-BELL award which should be handed out to the player who made the most horrendous hash of a simple straightforward contract, where if other players had been asked to throw tricks away they would have still achieved a better score than this particular bumbledog

PHILOSOPHICAL REFLECTIONS ON BRIDGE ...... ( By Professor Hu Chi Ku Chi )

Today, I'm posting an extract from Hermann Hesse's " Autobiographical Writings ", which aptly describes The Human Condition ....something that affects men in general......but bridge players in particular.

" What is great or small, important or unimportant ? The psychiatrists call a man unbalanced if he reacts sensitively and violently to small upsets, small irritations, small injuries to his dignity, when quite possibly the same individual will bear up bravely under sufferings and shocks that most men find it very hard to take. A man who is insensitive to constant humiliations, who puts up with the most wretched music, the most miserable architecture, the most polluted air without complaint, but who pounds the table and cries bloody murder when he loses so much as a trifle at cards, is regarded as healthy and normal. In bridge clubs I have often seen men of good reputation, generally regarded as perfectly normal and honorable, curse and fume so fanatically, so crudely, so bestially - especially when they felt the need of blaming a fellow player for their losses - that I very much wanted to seek out the nearest psychiatrist and have these unfortunates committed. "

Such an interesting observation....such a terrible tragedy.....such a shocking truth.

PHILOSOPHICAL REFLECTIONS ON BRIDGE..... ( First in a series by Professor Hu Chi Ku Chi )

THE PLEASURE AND THE PAIN

For many people, bridge is a meaningless, cruel and bizarre pastime......but for those of us who know and love the game, it is simply beautiful and magnificent. Yes, it can make fools and demons of us, but at the same time it can make us feel like Gods. Bridge is never a whim,,,,,,, it is a passion. Bridge is not a cruel sport it.......it is the ultimate challenge. People who have never played the game have no way of understanding its awesome appeal.

Bridge still tends to be more of a social game than a hard competitive sport, and even if it does get a bit bloody at times, it is far removed from the physically demanding games like boxing or football. For me the game is extremely gentle, subtle, far more beautiful and satisfying than any other recreational activity. Even when the game hurts us psychologically with a succession of bad results, or the relentless bickering of partners frustrated by your errors, the pain can be so easily washed away by the pleasures of recording a few good boards ........and the inevitable compliments that may come your way.

As players, we must endeavour to absorb painful experiences, the inexorability of disaster and defeat, into ourselves without shame or anger. We should not externalise our negative feelings by whinging and moaning.....but simply welcome and accept the despair... the anguish.......with an open mind and open arms. Only then can we really begin to experience the joy and pleasure this game of bridge has to offer.

As the great prophet Gibran once remarked : " The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain. Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven ? "

To a man dying of thirst, a simple glass of water becomes the the sweetest and most enjoyable drink of his life.