NEWSFLASH : ALARMING DEVELOPMENTS AT SHENANIGANS BC CAUSE THE EBU TO GET EXTREMELY WORRIED............
It was bound to happen with Bigot-Johnson in charge. The ultimate chairman is on the verge of changing the name of the club to Shenanigans Center of Approved Cheating , such is the widespread practice of peeking , eavesdropping , walkabouts , expressive body language , coded card placements and gestures , loaded questions , hesitations and cunning use of TDs.
When questioned the chairman firmly believed that the best way to create a level playing field " was to provide everyone with the same opportunities to develop and harness their cheating methods to the same universal standard ".
As a result of this bold brave initiative, special classes are being planned by the Bigot to educate those not yet familiar with the dark arts. Students will be taught and encouraged to use all the techniques so successfully employed by him over the years.
Indeed, the potential take up for these classes seems to be massive, with non-members from far and wide expected to join up. These are likely to include keen tournament players yet to achieve any level success , given their modest ability at the game.
Even the £100 session fee is not expected to curb demand as everyone seems utterly fascinated by the abstract beauty and subtlety of Bigot's dark and dastardly table antics, so full of invention , creativity and cunning.