THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY REVISITED...............

• Bridge diary : 365 pages full of recorded disappointments
• Rescue : what an inept player hopes will happen as his irate team-mates put a noose around his neck
• Run : the recommended pace one needs to adopt, if wanting to flee a baying lynch mob
• Incorrect ruling : a vagrant opinion given by a TD based on prejudice rather than equity
• Bridge : an incredibly social game played by some incredibly anti-social people
• Etiquette : an appropriate euphemism to describe the most subtle form of hypocrisy
• Bridge players : a strange group of people who collectively, but exclusively, have little or no regard for their partners
• Sure trick : in the case of weak players , this is usually the Ace of trumps