A SCENE FROM THE BENIGN BRIDGE CLUB USA..... ( where all the members fully believe in and endorse the Zero Tolerance Doctrine , imposing upon themselves very strict standards of best behaviour )

East : Sometimes I feel as if I am in a morgue such is the stillness and tranquillity of the place
West : Yes....ever since we embraced the zero tolerance policy everyone has become most pleasant and agreeable.....why just the other day when I accidentally trod on my partner's foot he thanked me profusely for reminding him that his bunion was still causing him great discomfort
North :  Please forgive me for being a bit of a doubting Thomas......but don't you find the atmosphere here stifling with its tedious , monotonous, flat , dreary platitudes and feigned bon hommie ?
South : Oh no.....I would much rather receive a feigned smile of welcome or approval than a mouthful of barbed comments and verbal abuse
North : Indeed.....but surely my good friend it is better to be honest with one's feelings than having to bite one's lip in an attempt to suppress them
East : Allow me to please interject.......there is no need to harbour negative feelings against others if one sets out to be congenial , caring, tolerant and sympathetic. Learning to forgive others is what the bible preaches.......
North : I'm terribly sorry but I am becoming more and more concerned that since the introduction of zero tolerance policies , everyone is this goddamn friggin' place....except me.... is wearing a straitjacket of conformity.......which in my book is a sign of madness !
West : Director.....director......
Director : What's the problem ?
West : North use two rather unpleasant words...
Director : Really....what were they ?
West : Goddamn ...and.....friggin'
Director : North .....I'm afraid you are no longer a welcome member at this club..... you are to leave the premises immediately
North : Hold on ...you just read those words from a script......are you an automaton or what ?
Director : North ......I'm afraid you are no longer a welcome member at this club....you are to leave the premises immediately
South : I love you North
East : So sorry to see your membership at this club end this way
West : I sorry I got you into this bother.....I really am
North ( mumbling under his breath ) : What a load of tossers ......I'm off to join the Slaughter House Bridge Club where people are real .....exciting......unpredictable.....and inspiring