BIGOT-JOHNSON GIVES HIS STUDENTS AN IMPORTANT LESSON IN PROBLEM SOLVING....
" Students....as you know , in bridge you must never jump to sudden conclusions when dealing with a tricky problem. Sometimes you need to view the problem from a different position or perspective in order to find the right answer. Any bridge expert will tell you that solutions to problems often come from a lateral thinking approach.
Please allow me to illustrate this point. Many of you have all been told about the alleged evils of alcohol, and with that in mind I wish you to consider this problem. Here is a glass of water and a glass of whisky. In each glass I shall place two worms. Notice how the worms in water swim about happily , while the worms in whisky are writhing about in pain before sinking to the bottom .....dead as door nails.
So the problem is this : which liquid would you advise an overweight big meat lover to consume on a regular basis...and state the reasons behind your choice "
One student immediately stands up and says ; " It's bloody obvious....you advise this person to drink water if he wants to keep his body healthy and well , avoiding in the process any risk of pain and suffering "
Bigot could not believe what he was hearing. His face grew red with anger : " You will never make a bridge player , since you have failed to see the problem from the right perspective....the correct answer is , of course , the person needs to drink whisky "
" Why ? "
" Why ! ....I'll tell you why , you moron....because if the fat boy drinks whisky he wont get worms ! " .