Thursday, 22 March 2018


Private parking companies operate in a moral vacuum. This is evidenced by their highly unethical business model , the key elements of which are listed below :

  • Our true mission statement needs to be kept under wraps. No one must know that it contains two primary objectives :  namely " customer exploitation " and " legitimate fraud " 
  • A PCN must be perceived by gullible motorists as a statutory " fine " : motorists must be kept ignorant of the fact that a PCN is nothing more than a speculative invoice or a claim for liquidated damages  
  • PCNs must have no bearing whatsoever with being genuine pre-estimates of loss : their one clear aim is to return an 80% profit from receipts in keeping with Pareto's recommended ratio
  • Sites must be set up like " honey traps " , inviting motorists in at their peril 
  • The irresistible lure of much sought after parking spaces creates a captive market . one to be fully and ruthlessly exploited
  • Motorists must never be viewed as " customers " : they are simply a means by which the company can make easy money 
  • It matters not that the pretext on which a PCN will be issued is trifling or absurd : what matters most is that the pretext is inventive or imaginative
  • The greater the number of contractual obligations imposed on the motorist the greater the likelihood of catching them out
  • All contractual terms and conditions imposed on the motorists must of course be strictly adhered to by them : no exceptions or excuses permitted
  • All manner of obstacles must be put in the way of motorists at every turn , if only to ensure a contractual breach becomes a regular and repeated occurance. These obstacles might well include :
                                 1. lack or absence of signage
                                 2. use of misleading and/or ambiguous words
                                 3. unreadable small print
                                 4. ticket machines that don't work properly
                                 5. restricted width of parking bays
                                 6. unclear parking bay boundaries

  • Overstays represent the best source of PCN revenue to the business , since motorists find it impossible to predict their intended length of stay. Therefore payment for tickets on leaving the site with ticket-operated exit barriers are a complete no-no

1 comment:

Howard Bigot-Johnson said...

This article is an outrage. Full of wicked lies. Private parking firms try to look after the majority of motorists by hammering the few. If I had my way motorists who break the rules would be flogged to within an inch of their lives. Why the law did away with clamping God only knows. That always got the buggers to pay up.

Yours loaded with money, Simon