Friday 2 March 2018

PROPOSED NEW PARKING BILL SENDS SHOCK WAVES THROUGH THE RANKS OF COWBOY OPERATORS 

A hurriedly convened meeting of the rogue cowboys took place at The Ritz in London as worried executives were now having to face up to the reality of having a multitude of legal restrictions placed upon their highly suspect business activities

That tosser Greg Knight ought to be shot
- Too bloody right......what the hell is he doing intoducing this Parking Bill ? Hasn'y he got
   any feelings for us ? This Bill could put an end to the numerous scams we've getting away
   with for years. 
-  How many scams might be under threat of being scuppered ?
-  About two dozen were mentioned in the debate 
-  About half the number we currently operating at the moment
-  My God this is a disaster
-  Greg reckons this Bill will mark the beginning of the end of these parasites......by which
   of course he means us
-  The bastard
-  And what's worse he wants the contract motorists enter into with us to be reasonable
-  Ahhhh ......that's awful
Transparent
-  Ahhhh ......that's obscene 
-  Involving a consistent process,,,, with poor signage, unresonable terms , exorbitant 
   parking charges, aggressive demands for payment....all to be consigned to the past
-  Ahhhh.......what god damn planet is this man on
-  Yes....I too feel your acute pain...... but all is not lost
-  Why's that ?
-  We have a valuable commodity........land.......land which is in short supply.....land which is 
    ideally located and desperately sought after by motorists who cannot find enough parking
    spaces on the street . In short we have a captive market which enables us to exploit 
    motorists to the full
-  Yes......I see where you're coming from.......since demand greatly exceeds supply .....we
    can damn well charge what we like
-   Which we certainly will .....say £5 an hour for a starters 
-   And in the event motorists stay away..... screaming shopkeepers will be up in arms and 
    therefore more than happy to subsidise any reduction we then introduce to our parking
    fees ........desperate to see their precious customers return
-   A win-win situation
-   Yes.....because it is a racing cert that this Bill will not include any provisions concerning 
    pricing policies or prescribed tariffs 
-   Praise the Lord for that

  

  


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