THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY.................................................................

• Pancake : this is how flat you feel after picking up the umpteenth hand, with a relatively pointless 4-3-3-3 distribution.
• Principle of preparedness : a concept of being prepared for all eventualities. Highly significant with regards to rebidding over partners responses, and what if any protection is required.
• Pushing your opponents : this term relates to either (a) physically moving them out of the way as you scramble to get to the mid-session refreshment table ( or bar ) first, or (b) making inappropriate or provocative comments which cause them to lose their focus and composure. Often, when it is the latter, the opponents bid on to a level where the contract cannot be made, or is ripe for a big penalty double.
• Post-Mortem : a necessary form of investigation that needs to be carried out whenever bodies of missing bridge players turn up in mysterious locations.....such as in shallow graves located in deserted woodland areas............ days after they recorded their worst ever bridge scores with partners of a highly volatile and unforgiving nature.
• PLOB : an acronym which stands for a petty, little, odious bids made by pernickety, slow approach system-driven players, who insist on making dozens of irritating, annoying, ultra-safe, artificial, investigative bids in tedious, drawn out, time-consuming, never-ending auctions.