BRIDGE CLUB SUB-COMMITTEE DISCIPLINARY HEARING No.349.....
( Pun , who in his first year of taking over the editorship of the club's newsletter, soon fell foul  of the committee's all embracing best behaviour at bridge policy. Despite earlier warnings about placing obscene double entendres on every page, Pun continued to use them in a valiant attempt to spice up articles, which would have otherwise been extremely dull and dreary. However, the last edition upset the prudish members of the committee to such an extent, Pun was dragged before a rather angry and vengeful disciplinary panel. A short extract from the hearing's transcript can be seen below.) 

Chairman (C) : So what have you got to say for yourself.......?
Pun : It's nice to get it out in the open.....don't you agree ?
C : So what do you got to say about this lastest newsletter ?
P : A masterpiece.....full of wit and humour
C : Full of puerile, inane drivel in our opinion....what we expect and what we should get are decent articles....mainly factual stuff........ such as the bidding and play of interesting hands, which members of course might well learn from..... or appreciate
P : Well, I would have included such articles if people had bothered to submit any..... instead of leaving me to provide the content.......
C : Listen you munchkin....... someone with balls has to come down hard on you....
P : Let me guess....  a well oiled upstanding member no doubt 
C : My God, you're disgusting.....you need to be shot... 
P :  I would prefer a lethal blow...if that's alright with you
C : That could be arranged....
P :  Best from behind.....
C :  Such vulgarity........that last double entendre you used was both lewd and sickening
P :  I'm sorry....but it just slipped out 
C :  This kind of vile, base, toilet humour has no place in this club ! It's for depraved people with low intellects and sick, perverted minds... 
P :  I disagree......surely, it is listener or reader who has the sick and depraved mind in order to reconstruct in his imagination the fully fledged obscenity from seemingly innocent or well intended words. The greater the disproportion between what is directly said in its innocence, and what obscenity is aroused by the mind of the listener, the finer is the witticism.....and the higher its value in good literature......Why Shakespeare himself was a master of the pun !
C : So what you're saying in effect..... is that words in statements can have double meanings, some of which lead sexually aroused respondents to immediately encode as an obscene references. Therefore, the effect is far more pronounced for high sex-anxiety respondents than for others ?
P : Not exactly, one simply needs to have a dirty mind in the first place to derive a " dirty " connotation from seemingly innocent words.
C  : But why pump so many into the club magazine ?
P : Because....the language of bridge is riddled with them....
C : Such as ?
P :  " I've got strength but not much length "......" you forced me ".... " you jumped me when you didn't have the strength for a good raise "..... " it helps if you've got a good hand "....." quick tricks "...." he's forever going down "......" picked up a queen "....." found partner with a stiff "...
" deprived an entry ".....
C : Yes...yes...I get the message......but I find all this very depressing....this is an issue we should put to the members at a EGM.... so they can all have an input..... 
P : Mass debating....... sounds good to me.....
C : Pun....you are completely incorrigible !