Tuesday, 8 July 2014


Dear Rebecca, 
What really gets up my nose ( other than an unwarranted air strike by a low flying bridgemate ) is the grossly inappropriate , highly patronizing , compliment " well played partner ", when an extremely inept opponent has only brought home the contract by virtue of some dreadful and catastrophic defending.
The other night a totally useless pair overbid their way to a hopeless 4H contract  destined to go off two on any bog standard defence. Despite declarer taking an inferior line for a possible minus 3 ,  my partner then endeavoured to gift him... not three.... but four bloody tricks . He did this by pulling out the wrong card , revoking on trick five ,   failing to remove dummy's last trump and failing to cash an established winner. Yet this patronising prat of an opponent had the gall to compliment his partner on his declarer play.
I ask you what is all this about ?

Yours Really Outraged from Oughtibridge  

Dear ROFO,
I with you all the way on this one. This is Best Behaviour at bridge has without a shadow of doubt gone a step too far. Praising partner's declarer play for getting a miracle score like that has to be a joke .  Why hide the bitter truth that the gift-wrapped result was handed to him on a silver plate ? 
If dummy is to say anything at all then words like " you jammy arse-hole " , " you undeserving bastard ", or " you must be the luckiest man alive " would be far more appropriate and honest , and far less likely to upset sensitive people like yourself.

Yours candidly Rood as ever


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