THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY............................

• Blank : what a player's mind usually becomes, prior to a decision over a critical bid, or play of a card
• Equals : a concept that is never applied to a bridge partnership, especially when each player believes that he/she is by far the better or stronger half
• DEPO : an acronym which stands for " Don't Ever Push Opponents " out of a doomed contract, or into one which is a makeable game
• Bermuda bowl: like the Bermuda Triangle, this relates to a phenomenon which causes a player's logic and reasoning to completely disappear off the face of the earth. Indeed , the skull which once served as a container for an active brain has suddenly become an empty bowl..............and no one as yet has provided any plausible explanation as to why this has happened
• Extra trick : the term given to an "add on" bonus a wealthy male sponsor might expect to get from a pro, who has received a rather large up-front payment for her services
• Crack : this has two possible meanings : (i) a substance cheating players resort to using when desperate to move up to a higher position , or (ii) the piercing and ear-splitting sound that comes from hitting your brittle-boned partner with excessive force
• Exit : the name given to the glass door your irate team captain throws you through head first, after handing over the most horrendous score-card ever