Wednesday, 8 September 2010

WHAT IT REALLY MEANS TO BE A BRIDGE EXPERT.......... ( By Dr. Sigmund T. Schukelgruber )
In amongst my many piles of literary treasures, I came across a poem ( unknown author ) that struck a real chord........a poem that superbly describes the smug delight I so often experience partnering a phony expert. All true experts, such as myself, who can always recognise the best bid and line of play, get great delight in pointing out where these " we-think-we-know-it-all " partners went wrong. There is so much joy to be had in getting them to acknowledge their responsibility for any scoring catastrophes. So with a little bit of tweaking here and there, here is my adaptation of a wonderful literary masterpiece...... re-titled " The knowing Expert " .
It gives me sly but sharp delight
To know how often I am right
How often, and, alas, how long
My partners insist on doing wrong
In all big games the fools dissent
From what I find self-evident
And end the maddening debate
Reluctantly.....perhaps too late
It can be comforting, I know
To say at last , " I told you so "
Whenever partners umm and arrh
They make decisions way off par
For while they dicker and delay
That's when their thinking goes astray
How much better our scores would be
If all these bastards agreed with me
But still it gives me sharp delight
To recollect that I was right

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