Sunday, 21 August 2011

TWENTY REASONS WHY BRIDGE IS A HUNTING SPORT....... ( Research by Professor Hu Chi Ku Chi )
The evidence is irrefutable. Bridge is a sport for hunters.....providing players with predatory , bunny bashing, bloodthirsty instincts the kind of killing fields they desperately search for , in which to run amok. Fools who still harbour a misguided belief that bridge is meant to be a social and friendly game are ignoring a shocking reality. The bridge player's dictionary is full of words loaded with murderous and barbaric connotations. The language can so easily conjure up images of slaughter and mayhem.
Indeed, players have been conditioned by this unpleasant language to develop a love, or should I say a sadistic passion , for.......
- putting opponents down
- random shootings
- smother plays
- axing opponents
- the colour red
- sticking the boot in
- squeezing opponents to death
- barrage bids
- taking a stab in the dark
- getting away with murder
- making take-out bids
- hammering home an advantage
- finding killing leads
- hitting opponents with uppercuts
- enticing them to make sacrifices
- severing their communications
- engineering elimination plays
- committing acts of daylight robbery
- making every bullet count
- attacking leads
So if anyone tells me bridge is not a violent sport then I am talking to a fool. However, if there is a concerted and co-ordinated effort on the part of bridge administrators to successfully implement best behaviour and zero tolerance initiatives in all clubs, then might I suggest that they adopt a new different vocabulary , or at least tone down the old one. What is urgently needed is a revised glossary of terms which send out a message of peace and goodwill, not one that incites players to develop violent, bloodthirsty instincts.

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