Wednesday 10 August 2011

MORE SNIPPETS OF CONVERSATION FROM THE SLAUGHTER HOUSE BC AS THE EBU'S BEST BEHAVIOUR AT BRIDGE INITIATIVE REALLY TAKES OFF........
Table 7 :( Friday ) 7.32 pm
South : That psyche of yours really undid us.....just like it did on the board before !
East : Oh.... I'm so sorry.....but it's a gadget I love to employ against players like you
South : That's nice
East : Yes...I am very careful to use psyches only against players I have utmost respect for
South : Thank you for being so complimentary
East : No......thank you for being so accommodating
Table 7 : 7.36 pm
South : Why....you've just gone and done it again. Another top through an outrageous psyche.
East : Yes....the best one ever
South : Well, it certainly bamboozled my partner and I
East : Indeed....in fact that one would have fooled even international grand masters
South : Thank God for that......I was beginning to think I was a numpy
East : No way.....you're a far better player than the average numpty
South : You're so kind....
Table 9 : 8.27 pm
North : Oh please forgive me....I think I may have revoked on trick 4
East : Well, since my partner and I didn't notice it....we'll pretend it didn't happen
North : That's very sporting of you, I must say
East : Well, it cancels out the deliberate revoke I made against you on an earlier board
North : Guess that evens things out then
East : It sure does....
Table 5 : 9.08 pm
South : Look what you have done....you've shot me in the leg
West : I'm so so sorry.....I did aim to miss
South : Well, I'm glad my leg took the bullet then ....otherwise there would have been a nasty hole in this lovely new carpet
West : My God....you're right....thanks for that
South : No problem....
Table 2 : 9.37 pm
East :...... DOUBLE
South : PASS
West : Now now partner.....that's not nice doubling their slam when I'm sitting here holding a fist full of trumps. I think you should take that bid back ........Is that alright with you North ?
North : Yes, absolutely
West : So that's it then.....6H is the contract....... undoubled
South : You're a saint
West : Yes....I do like to think so
Table 4 : 10.15 pm
East : Oh dear...I thought the TD would have given the decision our way
South : Sorry....that was never going to happen. He's a very good friend of ours
East : How nice.....it must be so useful to have friends in high places
South : Indeed it is
Table 6 : 10.17 pm
North : Well done you two..... such marvellous skill and ruthless efficiency shown there, in the way you capitalised on my partner's four unfortunate errors in his declarer play
East : Yes...we both feel really bad about it. Taking gifts without giving something back makes us feel cheap and nasty. Indeed, we are deeply embarrassed at having to take a top in such sad and tragic circumstances
North : You're so gracious...
Table 5 : 10.22 pm
West : Oh no partner....what can I say....I've gone off in grand slam simply because I took the finesse at trick 10 the wrong way
North : That must have hurt you a great deal
West : Yes....it jolly well did
North : Well....would you like to play the last 4 tricks again and this time guess right on the finesse
West : That would be mavellous....if that's alright with you
North : Of course it is.....I hate to see a grown man cry

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