Tuesday 10 August 2010

THE DEVIL'S DICTIONARY....................
  • Hog : a player with a voracious appetite for always sticking his snout in first, choosing to make anti-system bids in a desperate attempt to be declarer
  • Deviation : a psyche that has not cut its teeth. This type of incorrect bid is the nearest approach to an honest bid an habitual psycher can make.
  • Psyche : a dishonest bid guaranteed to undermine partnership understanding and trust. Often chosen as a mischief-making tactic, born out of frustration and/or boredom
  • Orange Book : a classic example of literary gobbledigook. A book which top players genuinely believe was written for them by their illustrious peers. Some critics claim that the rules were purely designed to punish lesser players, who clearly didn't know them. Other commentators have gone on to say that The Book provides irrefutable evidence to support a conspiracy theory : one that states that top players are deemed to be " thinking " before making a bid, whereas inferior, low life players simply " hesitate ".
  • Harangue : a verbal onslaught or tirade , only made by players renown for their primative instincts and uncouth habits. Not surprisingly, these immensely ignorant primates are often labelled as " harangue outangs ".

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