RIP OFF PARKING CHARGES : COMPANY'S BUSINESS MODEL EXPOSED AS A TRIBUTE TO THE KRAYS
Finally....a long-awaited tip-off led to an undercover BBC researcher infiltrating the headquarters of Rip Off Parking Solutions only to find the minutes of a secret meeting , in which the directors discussed the basic concepts needed to be embodied in the company's new business model.
These concepts were inspired by, and based upon , Ronnie and Reggie Kray's highly lucrative protection racket , which operated in London during the swinging 1960's. The key elements therefore in the proposed business model ran along the following lines :
1. Force motorists to enter into an agreement which is onerous in the extreme , and one
which will prove incredibly difficult to honour
2. Demand money from motorists for defaulting on the agreement no matter how trivial the
transgression happens to be
3. Offer a reduction on the over-the-top parking charge for prompt payment
4. In the likely event of motorists refusing to pay straightaway increase the debt on a
repeated basis by imposing extortionate claims for bogus administration and legal
5. Once the accumulated debt reaches four figures move the process of relentless
threats with menaces onto a much higher level. The longer the motorist resists in
coughing up the money the more it becomes necessary to make his life a living hell
6. Finally , send in the heavy mob to collect the debt in person , using whatever strong-
arm tactics seem appropriate in order to achieve the desired result
So welcome to the world of modern day racketeering .....where the spirits of these two notorious gangsters live on .