SMART ARSE PARKING SOLUTIONS v. BIGOT-JOHNSON (2018)
Once again Bigot was not prepared fall into the trap of paying a £100 parking charge for such a trivial transgression . Here was another car parking company. Another minor overstay. Another day in court to assert his dominance over these corporate gangsters.
Judge : Where's the counsel representing Smart Arse Parking ?
B-J : God knows
Judge : Well , if he's not here in the five minutes , I shall be obliged to kick out the claim and award the decision to the defendant by default
B-J : Yippee
( But just then a panting and puffing counsel rushes into the courtroom looked incredibly harassed and stressed )
Judge : You're late
CP : So sorry ...your Honour.....I was unavoidably delayed.......got caught up in a huge traffic jam due to an accident
Judge : So what is your case against the defendant ? CP : Overstaying by 12 minutes
B-J : Yes, that's true.....but I was late back to my car because I had been helping the police with an eye-witness statement following a mugging yards from where I was standing
CP : No excuses please ! This company has heard them all. Smart Arse Parking is not prepared to listen to pathetic excuses for overstays. Christ Almighty....one Supreme Court judge correctly pointed out that all motorists needed to do was to wear a watch... and keep careful track of the time
Judge : So you are unwilling to allow convenient excuses to warrant the cancellation or reduction of a parking charge ?
CP : Absolutely
Judge : So please tell me counsel were you wearing a watch today and keeping track of time ?
CP : Yes I was.....but surely you understand that unforeseen events can thwart even the best laid plans. Life can be so unpredictable
Judge : True.....so when it comes to turning up late to court ......you would argue that there are legitimate reasons entitling you to be absolved from any penalty or punishment
CP : Oh indeed.......that's only fair and right
Judge : But arriving late back to a car park is inexcusable then ?
CP : Yes...of course
Judge : This hypocrisy is intolerable. Common sense must prevail. Bigot's overstay deserves understanding , sympathy and compassion. Smart Arse Parking's inflexible stance on this matter to impose a £100 charge is manifestly unreasonable. I therefore declare the charge to be an unenforceable penalty
CP : But what about the Beavis ruling ?
Judge : Sod that......the circumstances here are different......case dismissed