RIP OFF PARKING'S TOP MAN TALKS TO AN UNDERCOVER BBC REPORTER
- Nice little business you run here
- Not half.....we make so much money it makes my eyes water
- I guess the market potential is huge
- It's massive..... given the fact its customer base is made up of stupid, spineless motorists
who we can fleece over and over again.... and of course with more people using cars to
go shopping at places where parking spaces are at a premium......the scene is set to cash
in on these suckers left, right and centre
- Like shoting fish in a barrel ?
- But surely customers matter ? Shouldn't meeting their needs be part of your company's
mission statement ?
- Bollocks to that......this type of customer is nothing more than a cash cow that needs to be
milked dry......or to put it another way........butchered
- And yes...... customers are mentioned in the company's mission statement in that we
commit ourselves to treating them all equally and in the same way
- What way is that then ?
- We treat them all like shit
- Well I never
- If any of our terms and conditions are broken.....no matter what pathetic reasons
motorists come back with to have their parking charges cancelled or reduced ....
we set about them in a unforgiving, pernicious way......such is the nature of our
voracious policies......there no room in business for sentiment or compassion. We treat
them all the same whether they are alive or dead
- What....even when they are dead ?
- Absolutely ......just because a motorist dies at the wheel of his car seconds after parking
it up in a bay......the fact he fails to purchase a ticket still means we have a legitimate claim on his estate for that £150 outstanding parking charge
- So do all motorists pay up ?
- I should say so.......not many can withstand the relentless onslaught of harassing letters,
threats and intimidation ? Indeed.....the majority cave in straightaway.....despite the fact
we obviously go out of our way to trick , deceive and entrap them. Even those who refuse
to pay the fines straightaway eventually capitulate when we up the ante and threaten them
with bailiffs, CCJs and loss of their credit ratings.......but then of course we do encounter
a very small, stubborn, well-educated group of motorists , who are more than prepared
to fight their case in court
- So do any of them win ?
- Unfortunately yes.....but we can't afford bow down and accept that we're batting on a
losing wicked......Good Lord no......the company will keep on persevering with taking
motorists to court come what may.......because the fear factor our policy creates far far
outweighs any of the decisions that often go against us
- Clearly then .....your policy is akin to a war of attrition......which most motorists don't
want to engage in
- Brilliant isn't it....
- Well , thanks for that interview .......the recording of that will go out on Panaroma next
- You little sod
- Well, that's what happens when you upset the producer of the programme by issuing
an unwarranted PCN to his wife , who keyed in an "5" instead of a "S"