Monday, 12 February 2018


- Nice little business you run here 
- Not half.....we make so much money it makes my eyes water
- I guess the market potential is huge
- It's massive..... given the fact its customer base is made up of stupid, spineless motorists
   who we can fleece over and over again.... and of course with more people using cars to 
   go shopping at places where parking spaces are at a premium......the scene is set to cash 
   in on these suckers left, right and centre
-  Like shoting fish in a barrel ?
-  Exactly
-  But surely customers matter ?  Shouldn't meeting their needs be part of your company's
   mission statement ?
-  Bollocks to that......this type of customer is nothing more than a cash cow that needs to be
   milked dry......or to put it another way........butchered 
-  Oh
-  And yes...... customers are mentioned in the company's mission statement in that we
   commit ourselves to treating them all equally and in the same way
-  What way is that then ?
-  We treat them all like shit
-  Well I never
-  If any of our terms and conditions are matter what pathetic reasons 
   motorists come back with to have their parking charges cancelled or reduced ....
   we set about them in a unforgiving, pernicious way......such is the nature of our
   voracious policies......there no room in business for sentiment or compassion. We treat
   them all the same whether they are alive or dead
- What....even when they are dead ?
- Absolutely ......just because a motorist dies at the wheel of his car seconds after parking
  it up in a bay......the fact he fails to purchase a ticket still means we have a legitimate claim    on his estate for that £150 outstanding parking charge 
-  So do all motorists pay up ? 
-  I should say so.......not many can withstand the relentless onslaught of harassing letters,
   threats and intimidation ?  Indeed.....the majority cave in straightaway.....despite the fact
   we obviously go out of our way to trick , deceive and entrap them. Even those who refuse 
   to pay the fines straightaway eventually capitulate when we up the ante and threaten them
   with bailiffs, CCJs and loss of their credit ratings.......but then of course we do encounter
   a very small, stubborn, well-educated group of motorists , who are more than prepared
   to fight their case in court
-   So do any of them win ?
-   Unfortunately yes.....but we can't afford bow down and accept that we're batting on a
     losing wicked......Good Lord no......the company will keep on persevering with taking
     motorists to court come what may.......because the fear factor our policy creates far far 
     outweighs any of the decisions that often go against us
-    Clearly then .....your policy is akin to a war of attrition......which most motorists don't 
     want to engage in
-    Brilliant isn't it....
-    Well , thanks for that interview .......the recording of that will go out on Panaroma next
-    You little sod
-    Well, that's what happens when you upset the producer of the programme by issuing
     an unwarranted PCN to his wife , who keyed in an "5" instead of a "S"  



No comments: