BRIDGE BOOKS WELL WORTH CHECKING OUT............. ( Says Pun )

• Sorry, I Can't Play With You Tonight......by Tara Musgoe is a gem of a book that will provide the reader with countless strategies and ideas on how to avoid partnering those dreadful people, who often beg you for a game. The author lists loads of devious ways and highly plausible excuses that will enable players, who are not used to lying, to escape the horror of partnering these numpties. Hurting their feelings is kept to an absolute minimum, except for the chapter that comments on methods that are designed to send them away for good.
• Tsunami Type Disasters At The Bridge Table.......by Ty Dale Wave exposes the most spectacular mishaps and turn rounds ever seen in major world tournaments. The author describes in great detail unbelievable hands where expert declarers make uncharacteristic mistakes in either the bidding or the play, enabling their opponents to enjoy the carnage from their hugely successful penalty doubles. Other chapters are devoted to shocking accounts of how seemingly unassailable leads in crucial matches were frittered away by teams, who at the very end still managed to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.
• Why Bigot-Johnson Always Partners Men ?..............By Annalee Keene looks at the gossip and rumours surrounding this most disturbing and unusual character. The author attempts to answer the question : Is Bigot-Johnson really queer ? Eventually, behind the scenes research provided the answer, when he broke into the rear of Bigot's property, and then used a back passage to enter his study. There he found numerous diaries, all of which revealed a troubled man's deep longing for male companionship, bonding and adoration.
• Implementing Best Behaviour Policies : A Bridge Too Far.......by Angus Forshaw reveals the growing trend of bridge clubs taking extreme measures to punish troublesome members, rather than implementing disciplinary procedures to expel them. With well documented accounts of beatings, whippings, thrashings, and torture filling the book with graphic detail, readers might find the content both shocking and upsetting. The author tells of one story where an errant member kissed his small but carefully preserved trump card to ruff a trick, which declarer thought he had won. The director was immediately summoned, whereupon he initiated a complaint about the player " defacing club property ", and " breaching hygiene rules regarding hand/mouth germ contamination" . His punishment was both swift and effective : the permanent wearing of an iron mask for all future duplicate and competition events at the club.