Bigot-Johnson had surprised a packed courtroom when he pleaded not guilty to a crime everyone knew he had committed.
Conducting his own defence, he appeared to get off to cracking start, employing all the antics, theatrics, and shenanigans everyone had come to expect. However today, despite all his grand gesturing, twisted arguments and philosophical clap trap, the jury seemed unimpressed.
Then out of the blue, Bigot stopped in his tracks, walked over towards the judge to declare that he was throwing in the towel.
" Your honour..........I have decided to change my plea to guilty. I do not wish to carry on with this high creative and cooked up defence........."
" Good grief man..... you were doing great job out there......I was almost warming to you. So please tell me , what on earth made you change your mind ? " enquired the puzzled and perplexed old judge.
" Of course.......you see when I pleaded not guilty I didn't notice just how many women there were on this jury. Throughout my whole life I have never been able to put one over a woman....and that goes for my wife too "
The judge quickly interjected. " What....you mean a leg ? "
"No...", said Bigot, " I mean being able to pull the wool over a woman's eyes. And with that pack of frigid man-haters sitting over there in the jury box, I had no bloody chance "
" Well, I never..."
" So I guess there's no chance of a re-trail...... with an all male jury ? " enquired Bigot , who had now turned into a forlorn and pitiful figure of a man .
" Not a chance..... " came the devastating reply.
And on that note everything went quiet for a few seconds, before a very loud " bugger " echoed around the walls of the courtroom.